They're all plants!

Do you suppose Fox News has it right and that Mark Sanford really IS a democrat? I mean, he must be a plant to make the republicans look as bad as possible. Just like Mark Foley, John McCain, Larry Craig* and a handful of others. My thought is this... these guys caused so much damage to the republican brand that it can't be accidental. Why else would Sanford keep digging himself this even deep hole? As John Stewart put it this week "God killed Michael Jackson to save your ass, and you gave another interview?"

It has to be deliberate. These guys are liberal plants, since as we know no true Scotsman Republican would sink so low as to do any of these things. They'd never cheat on their spouses, molest children, have bathroom sex, get hooked on drugs, humiliate themselves by publicly chasing skirt, or do any of the things that would cause them to have such a public scandal. These fellows are far too upstanding and moral beings for that. So it must be that these are soulless liberals, willing to infiltrate the party, hide like sleeper cells for years in order to attain power and then burst forth in scandals that make the republican party appear rife with hypocrites and thieves when really they're just doing Gods work.

Obvious really, once you think about it.


*This one isn't Fox, but I didn’t feel like hunting around forever to find a screen cap of that one.