When I answered this the first time, I didn't quite get what
they were asking, or whatever. So, let's answer it again.
When you're in a relationship with two or more
other people, how do you ensure you make time for the people you're not
sleeping with?
There are two ways to answer this. One, I can tell you about
how most the people I want to hang out with are either Not Local* and I know
them through the internet or have moved away to Not Local Land and I keep up
with them as best I can. However, that’s sort of a weak answer and leaves
people wondering why I don’t just make friends in the local area which is like
asking a depressive why they don’t just cheer the fuck up or asking a man on a
desert island why he doesn’t just eat the sand.
Let’s suppose people live local again, I deal with those
people like anyone else I suppose. Remember, one of my central tenets for
success is treating every relationship like its special and only separating friend
from lover by remembering who I’m supposed to kiss on the mouth. As a result, I
try to touch base with everyone on a regular basis, listen when they have
problems and so on. It might take a little more energy, but the last time I had
enough people local that I talked to, I managed. Of course, I could call people
on the phone now that cell plans have made long distance charges more or less a
thing of the past, but I don’t really like talking on the phone that much. Also,
I don’t like bothering people.
Besides, I’ll be honest, people also have my number. That
ended up causing problems for a while there, when I was about the only person
calling anyone, suggesting things to do, making sure people got out behind
their computers and did anything. So, yeah, that caused some issues as well.
Simple answer, effort. Not simple answer, there’s way more
to that than we can cover in a short post like this.
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