Magic Wand

You know, people keep saying "I can't just wave a magic wand and make that better.", which leads me to ask... Have you tried?

Seriously! Has even one of these work shy gits ever gone down to the magic shop, walked in and said in a loud steady voice "Harry, I want you to sell me a condom!"

Sorry, those slip out sometimes

Has anyone ever gone to the magic shop and said "I want a magic wand, and a good firm one if you will. I've got some serious waving ahead of me today."

Hav e they then, with magic wand in hand, ever actually waved the motherfucker while saying "Enney Meeny Chilli Beany" in a mystical voice?

NO!

Not a one of them has ever tried this.

Someone needs to get on that.